Chapter 12: Kissing

I stared at him over the dim light of the candles. We were sitting at the back of the restaurant in a darkened corner. I wasn't feeling the candles, they were doing the opposite of setting the mood, but there he was with that sexy smile and that playboy swagger, his smell was so enticing. His kissable lips twisted in a smile and he leaned in to me, wordlessly telling me to kiss him. I leaned in to his kiss, his soft lips pressed against mine, his eyes were closed, I kept mine open I wanted to see...what? I couldn't see his face with mine being up against it, I had a view of his ear and the people sitting at the table behind us, an older couple who had gone through two bottles of wine and hardly touched their salmon. His lips parted mine, his warm tongue entered my mouth, tickling my lips and poking at my own tongue. I giggled, this was stupid and weird, why did people do this? He sat back and smiled at me. "What?"

"Nothing." I grinned, I wasn't a girly girl, I'd never dated but I knew better than to tell a guy kissing him felt funny. Maybe I should only kiss him when I was drunk...his kisses didn't feel so slimy and wrong then. Maybe he was a bad kisser? No, he couldn't be, if now women wouldn't throw themselves at him.

"What happens now? It's your call."

I shrugged and sipped my wine, I was going light on the alcohol tonight, I didn't need a repeat of Saturday. "Well, you've already gotten further with me than any man in my history of men timeline. Second base is a record dude. I'll throw the ball back in your court, you're a celebrity, you can pick, choose and refuse women. I've never had a boyfriend before, I've never had sex and that's not something I want to run into, I'm not even sure I like kissing you..." My voice trailed off, I said it. I waited for Flow's reaction, he did seem shocked but there was amusement too.

"You're the kind of woman a man wouldn't mind waiting on and I do want to be your first boyfriend. I want to be the man who shows you the finer things in life, to show you that you're a queen and you deserve to be treated like one."

Cheesy! I thought. What the fuck!?! This man was every woman's dream! What was wrong with me? Was I gay? No, my supervisor made me melt and JQ had caught me staring while he showered a couple times, I was most definitely not gay, I just wasn't feeling Flow. I needed to call London.

"I also don't want to be cheated on, if you're going to be my boyfriend you'll have to commit one hundred percent."

"I'm down for that baby."

Yeah, I bet you say that to all the virgins you turn out. "I guess I can give the boyfriend thing a try." I wondered if he thought this date was as awkward as I did. I stood up, "I've got to finish some designs, maybe we can hang out tomorrow after work."

"I'll be in L.A. tomorrow, I've got an interview. I'll call you though."

"Sure."

I allowed Flow to kiss me again when he dropped me off. I dialed London's cell phone as soon as I entered the building, she answered on the first ring. "What's up in New York?"

"Just got off a date with Flow, I think he's my boyfriend now." She squealed, I moved the phone away from my ear.

"No London, listen, he keeps trying to run tired old lines on me, it's like, he doesn't have to put any effort into getting girls because he's freakin' Flow, but I'm not impressed."

"Wait, was that you in the picture that's all over the internet?"

"Yes, now focus..."

"No fuckin' way! I am so jealous! You've been there a week an you'll already all over the biggest musician around right now..." I sat by the fountain and let my cousin babble on and on, she would listen once she got it out of her system.

"You know what, maybe I'll talk to you tomorrow. I'm tired all of a sudden." I hung up before she could protest and went to my apartment.

"Where is everybody?" I asked JQ who was sitting in front of the TV eating a bowl of cereal. "Coco, Kitty and Scarlet are at work. Dom and Roman went to a movie."

"Why are you here?"

"Because I live here. How was your date?"

I dropped beside JQ and stared at him until he looked at me. "I think I need you to kiss me."

He laughed and then his eyebrows shot up. "You're serious? I can't right now, I've got cereal in my teeth."

"Just do it, I'm not going to instantly fall in love with you. I'm having problems falling in love with Flow."

"It's been one date, I don't think he's in love with you either."

"Just kiss me." I begged and pouted.

JQ signed and muttered something about Roman and murder but he leaned in to me anyway and I laughed, he straightened up and laughed too. I'm not sure what he was laughing at but I was laughing at how much of a punk he was, no wonder Dom rode his ass whenever she was bored. He wasn't even committing to kissing me, he just leaned in and left it for me to go for it, he was like a living, breathing, sex doll that had a brain.

"Come on JQ, this is serious!"

"Now you're pressuring me." He set the bowl down. "Seriously, when I lean in to you don't bust up laughing."

"Okay, I'm ready now."

He leaned in, I leaned in and laughed again. "I'm sorry this is weird. Kissing is so stupid, it's like...licking slime."

JQ pulled my head in toward his and captured my bottom lip between his teeth, he tugged lightly and chuckled. "Y'all wasn't doin' it right." He said with his face centimeters from mine, his breath tickled my lips and nose when he spoke. He nipped my lip again and I bit at his top lip, he chuckled and closed his lips around my top lip, once, twice, bottom lip, once, twice. My lips parted of their own accord, JQ slipped his tongue inside my mouth but didn't rape my mouth with it. His tongue probed the inside of my mouth gently, I followed his tongue to his mouth and he gently sucked it. I could taste the cinnamon from the cereal he'd just eaten inside his mouth, I captured his bottom lip and sucked, his lips tasted amazing! They were sweet, I moaned and he immediately broke the kiss. He was panting lightly. I was panting a little!

"Uh..." JQ picked his bowl back up. "There you have it, that'll be ten dollars, my lessons aren't free." He grinned, my eyes went to his lips, I wanted more but I knew better than to push the limit. I was in a relationship after all...I think.

"I have to go call my cousin." I lied, I was not about to say anything to London about Flow being a bad kisser and how kissing JQ left me weak in the knees and soaked in the crutch. I had caught on to Flow's game, if JQ hadn't shown up Saturday night, I would have been face down ass up in Flow's bed, he would have no regrets while I was left kicking my ass because I'd done something I wasn't ready for. New York was supposed to be the place where I found myself, where I broke out of my comfort zone. Flow would be my experimental boyfriend, I would merely be testing a relationship with him but I would guard my heart and my hymen.